Jerry Seinfeld: [Lemon is wearing a wedding dress] Well, well, well. So you called that boyfriend.
Liz Lemon: Yes I did.
Jerry Seinfeld: And it went well?
Liz Lemon: No. It didn't, Jer. A woman answered.
Jerry Seinfeld: Another woman already? What did you say to her?
Liz Lemon: [starts breaking down] I did a fake survey!
Jerry Seinfeld: [raises voice in typical Seinfeld manner] You did the fake survey?
Liz Lemon: [raises voice too] I know. I'm not over it! And now I'm wearing this. What is the deal with my life?
Jerry Seinfeld: Are you imitating me?
Liz Lemon: No! This is what I sound like when I cry!
Jerry Seinfeld: I think I'm a little insulted.
Liz Lemon: You're insulted? I'm crying!
There’s no such thing as bisexual. It’s just something invented in the 90’s to...– Liz Lemon (30 Rock) (via atestu)
who’s up for a one minute dance party?
To get through it I pretended he was a sandwich.– Liz Lemon
30rockthings: That’s Her Instrumental
30rockthings: Pete: Oh Lemon, in the 10 years that I’ve known you, you’ve had some really terrible boyfriends. Liz: I have. Pete: There was the guy who was obsessed with Charlie Chapman. Liz: Neil. Pete: There was the guy who played Halo under the name “slutbanger.” Liz: Dennis. Pete: There was the tall gangly red haired guy who played guitar all the time. Liz: Conan.
Phoebe: You know how John Lennon was better then all the rest of the Beatles but he never realized it until he met Yoko? Well I'm gonna be Jack's Yoko!
Liz: You want to be Yoko?!
conan (ep. subway hero)
Mr. Bright: “I just wandered around the building all night. I didn’t run into another single living soul. Except one gigantic lesbian. Who is Conan O’Brien and why is she so sad?” submitted by leakysunglasses
the black and white photos behind liz lemons desk are pictures from tina’s days back at second city.